New school year

Contrarian and his brother spent 6 weeks in South Africa visiting their real dad and his family. They had a great time. Not always easy and big brother assures me that contrarian behaved more like 'a retard' than usual but I'll put that down to sibling rivalry.

There where a few 'incidents' - one involving contrarian smacking another girl in the face. It was awkward for a while but fortunately some of the adults there were aware of contrarian's intolerance for strangers.

When my ex phoned to voice his distress about the incident I couldn't help but think:"Finally you know what it's like to walk in my shoes'. Instead I said :"I'm sure that if you explain the situation to your friend's they will be understanding - they are after all your friends".

I felt determined that for 6 weeks their real dad should handle anything and everything that came his way. Apparently there were some very chaotic moments but all in all I felt that the boy bonded with his dad and that they had a good time.

The medicine went walk about somewhere in the Drakensberg - 3 weeks into the holiday. We have started the medicine again (one tablet pr day) and things are working out great. I'm still not entirely convinced the medication is the cause of all the positive things in our life. I believe there is a lot to be said for a child's sense of security and acceptance not to mention human connection. Something which we have received a lot of lately.

Contrarian is happy to be home with his friends and it is showing. He has had a wonderful start to the school year.

This week I have spoken to the school inspector, the new teacher and the special education teacher. They assure me that everything is going very well and they have no concerns. The boy himself is very happy.

We received a letter from the school. contrarian has been approved for 228 hours of special education (social education) and 760 hours for a personal assistant - either in a group or alone.

The social education started this week with a trip to the forest to build a lavvo (social dynamics group work). Contrarian refused to go with as he wanted to stay in the classroom with the rest of the class.

The teacher wasn't fazed by it at all as contrarian did the classroom work with no problem. But the special education teacher phoned and asked me to talk to contrarian about going with to build the lavvo.

We have asked contrarian several times if he feels a difference on the tablets but his response is always "No, just stomach ache!".

I have a meeting with BUP (children's psychiatric department) on Tuesday. They want to hear how things are going with contrarian.

Right now - life is everything we have ever wished for!

Nevropsykologisk rapport

Tuesday 22 March

Today I had a meeting with the neuropsychologist.

He strongly feels that contrarian has ADHD in addition to Aspergers. It's difficult to know if the 'impulsive behavior' is a symptom of the Aspergers or ADHD but there's a strong possibility it's the ADHD.

If it is a symptom of ADHD then medication could help in the therapy.

If it's a symptom of Aspergers - well then the medication won't do much good.

I have always been very reluctant to use drugs on a child. Drugs have no place in a child's body. But then there are children like my son who really want to 'fit in'. Like most children - he just wants to be like everybody else. The thing is - he's not like everybody else.

If medication can give him the 'thing' that he needs to be able to behave like other kids in new situations and with strangers - maybe that's a good thing.

Maybe it will open a whole new world for him. The ability to try new things and make new friends.

Everything is going well at the moment. The three musketeers (friends) have found eachother again.

I had a meeting with his teacher yesterday. Things are going well at school - much better than they used to. This last week he has been uncooperative and questioning everything but it is always much better than it was a few months back.

The teacher has put contrarian in charge of a project - teaching the other kids English by presenting them with questions to answer.

He thrives in his role as 'English teacher'.

Below is a diagram. The average is 50. It is clear that contrarians ability to focus and shift focus is way below average.

An appointment has been made with the psychiatrist for 1 June.

Visit to the Neuropsychologist

February 22nd - Contrarian spent the morning with the specialist (neuropsychologist) doing tests.

The doc said that it was a slow start but picked up. Contrarian said that the doc didn't speak to him that much- he just had to do tests on a computer - like push the spacebar when he didn't see a letter that was X.

I'm sure that they did a lot more during the 2 hours but I will find out later when they call me in.

Contrarian is no longer so friendly with two of his friends. Once the 'bleyblade' phase was over the boys didn't seem so eager on each other's company.

He is spending more time with his original friend with the playstation. They have a very dynamic relationship because they are similar in some ways. It turns out this little boy's parents were called in by PPT recently. His parent's have told me so I know what is going on but I don't want to talk about another child on this blog.

Contrarian had a little outburst at school last week but other than that he is very happy at school. The incident happened when a new teacher (stranger) tried to take his ice hockey stick away from him - that would be the ice hockey stick that he sleeps with in bed (he was demonstrating something in the hallway).

She hadn't yet been informed that contrarian is Aspergers so she got annoyed with him when he didn't 'respond' to her. Contrarian was devastated and had a shutdown. Fortunately his assistant heard the commotion and came running. It was resolved once his own teacher and assistant took care of the situation.

We have worked on defining his relationship with the ice hockey stick. He is now able to leave it in the hallway at home so that he doesn't knock things over inside the house.

Meeting with the school, PPT and BUP

On the 1st December we had a meeting at the school - BUP, PPT, teacher and school inspector. It was interesting and I must say that I feel cofident that all parties involved are doing their best for my little contrarian.

The diagnoses has not been given yet as we still have a few more weeks of observation/questioning. However, BUP felt confident enough to inform the school that we are dealing with both ADHD and Aspergers.

It's just not decided which one affects his behaviour most and where on the Autism spectrum he is.

I was considering renaming my blog 'twice exceptional' but I think I'll have to go with 'three times exceptional'.

Highly gifted, ADHD and Aspergers. That does allow for a dynamic mixture.

The social side is going better than ever. Our contrarian is visiting one of his two new friends nearly every day of the week. I have informed the parents of the situation and told them to please just let me know if it gets too much for them.

The 'Vennegruppe' last week went well. I'm glad I went with and stayed because my little chap did get very 'enthusiastic' at times but I managed to calm him down reasonably fast.

The school has introduced a 'motivational learning chart' where he gets a star if he completes X amount of questions.

He might have outgrown the stars but I will add a beyblade of his choice if he manages to get all the stars for the month.

We have to work on his motivation!